I'M BACK!

Full disclosure: I've been traveling since last Friday and have scheduled posts. I haven't responded to any comments because aside from Saturday I've been going non-stop.  However, I had a lot of thoughts that wouldn't fit in a post on IG, and who reads through crap on FB anymore, right?

For some time now, every time I've left the kids, I really didn't "pine" for them so to speak. I thought about them, hoped they were behaving for whatever governing authority was home with them, but otherwise was doing what I came to do.  Whether that be work related, self-care with a girlfriend, or a quick getaway with my husband, I've always enjoyed myself.  I've always looked forward to and love my little two day trips that I've taken (the whole two times this year).

Friday/Saturday was alllll me time with my best friend in Mizzou country. Then Sunday/Monday/Tuesday/Wednesday was working on finding housing for my sister in Austin, Texas.

Yesterday I hit a wall.

Apparently, just around the 4.5 day mark, I'm done. I want my kids. I was weepy the whole day wanting to talk to them, hold them, see them, sing to them, do all the things with them, even argue with them.  I missed them something fierce and wanted to be home with them so bad.  It was the first time I've left them for more than three nights and even then, that's only happened a two times over the course of Gemma's life, and once in Ella's.

I honestly judged myself SO hard when I was still going perfectly on my way not really quote on quote missing them. What's wrong with me? Why am I so fine?  Let's be honest, I knew they probably weren't being good, so maaaaybe I didn't even call one day.  I did feel guilty that my mom or Dan were having to deal with monsters.  Such is life though.

Obviously I needed a break (they probably did too), and the previous night or two breaks weren't really cutting it. We all needed a little space, especially after #quarantine2020.  Amiright?  We've been together nonstop since the beginning of March, and I was already a work from home mom, so we always had an element of being together nonstop.

A few months ago Dan went on a fishing trip to Texas and turned around a day later and came home. He missed us.

What? What crazy talk is this? You got away! You're free! Enjoy! Spread your wings, fool (my exact words- we're so loving)!  But no. Crazy pants missed us (full disclosure: he was over that sentiment 20 minutes into his return home ????).

Well yesterday as I was telling him how bad I missed home and him and the kids and he was like see?  SEE???  I TOLD you (which I then reminded him NOT so gently that he lasted one measly day- he's pathetic). But I do finally get why he misses us so much, even if he's doing something he enjoys doing.  It's not the same when your family isn't with you.  FOMO maybe?

Anyways, I'd love to hear from the parents that leave for a week for vacation with friends or husbands.  Or women that travel for work for a week or more at a time.  Am I crazy for being just fine for days before losing it?  Is it normal to absolutely hit a wall and be willing to drive 14 hours to get home faster?

Until next time,

Jen

(enjoy adorable baby pictures of Jameson)